Being a HR - When the wife of a staff calls...

My mobile phone rings, I notice it is a number I do not have in my contact list. I pick nonetheless; I actually pick ALL calls

Me: Hello!

Caller: Hello. I am Mrs. Ng'anene, a wife to your colleague Mr. Ng'anene.

Me: Yes, how may I help you this morning.

Her: I first have to explain how I got your number. I stole it from my husband's phone when he left it on the table. I know you are his HR which is the reason I am calling.

Me: Yes my dear. True I am his HR but I need clarity on why you called...

Her: You are the one who gave my husband a job and he has ended up being a very bad man. You should have just left him where he was before earning that small money which was giving us no peace at home.

Me: I do not give people jobs. I recruit people who are the best fit for our needs. He passed a process and got the job. I did not give him the job.

Her: Since you gave him that job, he has decided to have another family. I understand he has another woman he vibrates* in back there in the city and barely comes home to me and our children. I also understand that he insured that woman and her child as well and left us out of your office medical insurance.

Me: I have over 200 employees too manage. I cannot tell expressly the names of the dependants they have insured in our medical cover. (Then I recall the dude had failed to return his medical insurance form citing the fact that he had more children than the maximum we could cover; of course that was a lie)

Her: Please remember I am the one who is married to Ng'anene and should be insured together with our children. Not someone he just met because of the money you pay him. Please check his records keenly so we are sure we are in his official records if anything happens to him (read if he dies at work)

She does not know that the HR Office does not appoint dependants or tell staff the names of the people to place in their forms. That is a choice that is inalienable. They pick their mothers, children, brothers, screwmates as next of kin; we just keep the records.

Me: I am sadly unable to make such investigations on who exists in his records or amend them. I will however talk to him if you wish so he has your in the medical cover if he has not yet done so.

Her: Thank you Arody and feel free to tell him I called. That can scare him and make him responsible.

As to whether I scare adults; the adults can tell.

I call the dude and as him where his medical insurance form is and he brings it the day following with the wife and children nominated for cover.

That is all in the working life in a HR Office. Now you know your partner calls us too.

*'vibrate' is a synonym for bigger things done during the week when temperatures are low.